Living in Southwest China for 15 months, I spent much of my time in lesbian designated establishments and spoke with hundreds of queer women about their lives. Homosexuality has been legal in Mainland China since 1997 and was removed from the list of mental illnesses in 2001, but same-sex unions are not legal and the public often remains ignorant or ambivalent when it comes to same-sex relationships. For most young adults regardless of sexuality, the pressure to marry and have children persists, yet adoption is only available to married heterosexual couples. At the same time, there are hubs in China with relative freedom where being openly gay or lesbian is not stigmatized. It is not uncommon for younger individuals to come out to friends, and not unheard of to be out to at least some family members. Still, I heard stories of heartbreak after either one or both women made the decision to give up on their relationship and suppress their sexuality, often at a great cost. Certainly not all lesbians in China follow this course however, and some are finding unique ways of navigating through or around traditional expectations. Given this general backdrop, my research documents how individual lesbians have responded to these pressures without denying their sexuality. The results demonstrate how different women have employed various degrees of agency in pursuit of options that are unavailable through Chinese social structures and institutions. Rather than attempting to portray lesbians overall, my focus remains on the small handful of women I spoke with in depth in order to convey the complexity of their circumstances. Their perspectives are not commonly known in China or abroad. By sharing their stories, I hope to expand the range of personal narratives to include the diversity of experiences I encountered among lesbians within Southwest China.